Building Blocks

A couple of days ago, I decided to get my camera out and be still. To just watch my boys enjoying themselves and each other. A very rare moment. They were actually helping each other build something instead of being intent on tearing down what the other had made.

I just observed.

It made my heart happy to be still. To remember that I actually can enjoy my kids.

To be thankful for those sweet hands and that 90% of the day they are grasping that lovie.

Thankful for these blocks that will probably belong to someone else one day.

Loving the way he sits on his feet. (I mean, seriously, who still sits like this?)

And, I thank Jesus for the now. For this moment. I thank Him for pursuing me. For reminding me of how he loves me right now. In this very moment. When I am still. Not in the doing, but in the being.

Because, frankly, it's hard to just "be". I want to do. I want to go. But over the last month or so, there hasn't been much doing. I've been sick and worn out. Wondering when relief will come. (And it has, little my little.) Wondering when I will have a clear answer for some ongoing health issues.

I feel like I'm already harsh with my kids and then heap sickness on top of that. Oh, boy. Praying that God would renew my heart and give me more of Jesus. Praying that God will redeem these hard times and make them into something beautiful. Thanking Him for giving me moments like this when I can just be still and love my boys and know that I am loved completely by Him. He has been tearing down the blocks I attempt to build my life upon and I am begging Him to rebuild them with the blocks of His love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, gentleness, faithfulness and self control.

Clinging to verses like Deut 32:4,"He is the Rock. His works are perfect and all His ways are just. A faithful God who does no wrong, upright and just is He."

Praying that I would believe in my unbelief and that He would be my precious "cornerstone".

Psalm 118

1 Give thanks to the LORD, for he is good; his love endures forever... 4 Let those who fear the LORD say: "His love endures forever." 5 In my anguish I cried to the LORD, and he answered by setting me free. ... 7 The LORD is with me; he is my helper. 8 It is better to take refuge in the LORD than to trust in man. 9 It is better to take refuge in the LORD than to trust in princes...19 Open for me the gates of righteousness; I will enter and give thanks to the LORD. 20 This is the gate of the LORD through which the righteous may enter. 21 I will give you thanks, for you answered me; you have become my salvation. 22 The stone the builders rejected has become the capstone; 23 the LORD has done this, and it is marvelous in our eyes.24 This is the day the LORD has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it. 29 Give thanks to the LORD, for he is good; his love endures forever.